Controlling: Unreliable Narrator

It was my first time using a dating website. We were going to meet at a restaurant downtown where I have never been. When I entered the building, I was disgusted. The lights were way to close to the tables, the flowers on the table were dead, and the spices on the table were not arranged in alphabetical order. I could already tell this date was not going to go well.

When he arrived I was freaking out. He looked like a slob! His shirt was not tucked in and his tie was way too long. I was about ready to get up and leave but I figured I might as well give this guy a chance. He was running out of chances though. His breath. Oh my god his breath made me want to puke. It was like the smell of a rotten egg sitting in the hot sun on a hot summer day. There were so many things that bothered me about him, but I’ll just continue on with how our date went. First we ordered, and he got a hamburger, which implies he is a messy and very casual person. I ordered chicken risotto, which implies that I am a very classy and sophisticated person. Then when he started eating, something automatically caught my attention, the sloppiness of his eating habits. It disgusts me, he had his elbows on the table, chewed with his mouth open, and barely even stopped in between bites to breath. After he finally finished eating, I told him all the things that annoyed me about him like I always tell my dates because I like being honest. For the first time ever, he didn’t leave right after I told him all this! Usually, after I be completely honest with my date they storm out like a child and never speak to me again. This one act of kindness completely changed my perspective of him. This could actually work if he just changed some of those obnoxious habits.

After our first date he started texting me. Hi, he said. Oh my gosh, no one has ever put in an effort to continue talking to me after we first meet. They usually say that I am obnoxious, or they just run away. After this moment I knew that it was true love, it was meant to be, it was destiny. I might as well go get my engagement ring now so I get exactly what I want. When he proposes, it will be so romantic! It will be on the beach in Florida while the sun is setting and he will get on one knee and say, will you marry me? Then I will say yes obviously, unless I don’t like his outfit, that would be a total deal breaker!

 

 

Lost: A Short Short Story (Test)

   

I woke up on a cold, hard, cement floor, my head rushing with thoughts from the night before, hurting so much I could barely think, no memory of what happened...except for my name, which must have something to do with the huge, throbbing wound on my head, it was covered with dry blood, I abandon my thoughts and focused on the creaking stairs, a shadow of a tall, skinny man approaching me made my heart rate speed up, I was scared, I was alone in an unfamiliar place, the shadow, a total facade of the real person, this mysterious man...short, fat and… his face… I have definitely seen his face before, I remember from last night, he said to me in a deep low voice, How’s your head? I did not expect this kind of response, him approaching me in the dark was now a vague memory, I thought he must have been a bad guy, he seemed overly concerned, I responded, Good, I guess, I sounded vulnerable, scared, and confused, I was all of these things, he explained to me how he found me, I was lying there, on the side of the road, unconscious, a trail of blood leading down my head, he took me here, cleaned my head, let me rest, my head started spinning with thoughts, what happened to me? who was this guy?  who would want to hurt me this way? why would they want to hurt me? what did I do to them? why didn’t he just call the police? and if he was trying to help me why would he leave me in this cold, moldy, basement? another thing, if this stranger cleaned my head, why was I still covered in blood! nowhere in my mind could I find an explanation, like any normal, curious person, I asked, what the heck happened to me? he already told me everything he knew, he sounded unsure, I didn’t believe him at all...something was happening... my memories were unfolding in my head, remembering what truly happened last night, like a movie playing out in my head with my memory, it began with me walking through a neighborhood at night, I was looking for something, or someone… I was looking for my phone after a party... I came across someone, maybe a jogger, with the same face as the mysterious man, we casually passed each other, I turned around, curious as to who he was, I saw a shovel swinging towards my head and, bang! I fell to the ground, still not understanding the motive, I thought, why? who was this person? then it came to me, he was on the news, wanted revenge against America, some weird thing I thought was fake and would never happen here, I abandon my thoughts, focused on the real world, I heard a noise coming from behind, it sounded like a gun being loaded, I turned around and saw...

   

Getting Under My Skin: Self- Deprecation

            My family, friends, and even strangers always find a way to get on my nerves. Somehow they all find a way to grind my gears. Anywhere from tapping their pencil repeatedly on a table, to kicking my seat on an airplane will allow you to annoy me to my breaking point. I personally think I am a generally calm person, but I get annoyed very easily. Even though I get annoyed easily, I tend to hold in my fury and, lucky for you, I won’t unleash my unbearable wrath. Some people might say I lose it in certain occasions, and that might sometimes be true, but I can guarantee you in this situation, I did not over react. I just find it preposterous how some people can be so inconsiderate.

            Anyways, it was just like any ordinary day this summer. I awoke to rays of sunshine coming in through the shades in my room. It was probably around eleven in the morning and, as usual, I went into my living room which usually smelled like eggs from the kitchen, even though I don’t like eggs, and I started watching TV. As I was watching TV, actually I was on my phone totally oblivious to the TV, but I remembered The Amazing Spiderman 2 came out on DVD. I was ecstatic, overjoyed, and thrilled all at the same time! Those words don’t even express how excited I was. I loved that movie and was a devoted fan, also Andrew Garfield is easy on the eyes. Of course, I very kindly asked my mom to get it. I was almost certain she would say yes because before it came out she said I could get it, but I went with the safe approach just in case she was in a bad mood. I said something like, mother darling, would you be oh so kind and allow me to get The Amazing Spiderman on DVD? with a big smile on my face and even used the classic puppy dog eyes. To my dismay, she used they inevitable, typical mom remark like, maybe next week, wait until Christmas, or worst of all, didn’t you already see it in the movie theaters? This response was like nails on a chalkboard to me. The last response was echoing in my head like it was taunting me, didn’t you just see it in the movie theatres? It drove me up a wall when she said this because you cannot only see a movie once to experience the irrepressible hunk of emotions and vibes. You cannot simultaneously be balling your eyes out and watch the movie! Also, even if you don’t cry during movies, it is almost impossible to avoid a vulnerable, hormonal teenage girl at the movies so you are bound to miss at least one scene. The chances of this not happening to you are as likely as you being struck by lightning.

            Consequently, as a result of this tragic and depressing moment, I was, in lighter terms, down in the dumps. This horrific situation made me so irritated because my mother did not see this as a big deal! This flabbergasted me because how could you not see this as a big deal? I practically memorized the first movie, and no, I’m not a lunatic, but it would only be fair to memorize the second movie too, right? Well, my mom made the intellectual conclusion that I didn’t need the second movie on DVD and that was final. My feeble attempt to convince her to buy it for me was to sit on the kitchen floor for as long as physically possible. This had no effect on my mom what so ever. I was agitated to the point that I wanted to strangle everyone I saw. In the end, however, I was triumph it. I had the brilliant idea of just asking my dad!

            Additionally, it is unmistakable that I can get annoyed very easily by the little things, like when people leave empty food boxes in the pantry. Is it really that big of a burden to throw it in the trash or recycle? Although that irritates me a lot, I found it horrifying to learn that I can actually annoy myself. I get irked when I procrastinate, I practically procrastinate twenty four seven. How much I put off my work is pathetic. The inner fight I have against myself about procrastinating was like World War II happening in my head. In fact, I am procrastinating writing and revising this essay right at this very moment! Wow, shocker! The dilly-dallying began with TV, as usual. I began with watching Twelve Years a Slave. Since this movie was so depressing, I wanted to make sure I did not spew my emotions into my work. Then I heard a growling coming from my stomach that was screaming at me, I need food. I could not conceal the fact that I was extremely hungry anymore and I needed a snack. So I got a snack fit for a king which, obviously, took a significant amount of time to eat. But wait, now I need music to get my creative juices flowing so I got my headphone and phone. Finally, I was out of lame excuses to not write my story. It was time to sit down and conquer this writing assignment, but then I thought it would just be more efficient to finish it tomorrow.

 

RAFT Story

 

            I wake up in the morning looking forward to only one thing. I get out of bed, grab a piece of bread, and walk over to the cage. In this cage, lives my only real friends. The only people who accept me for who I am. They don’t even have legs, but wings and beaks. My pets will always be there for me, even if I’m not there for them because I’m at my job. Work, on the other hand is something I most definitely do not enjoy. I enjoy work just as much as a fish enjoys being out of water. I spend my day serving battered and fried food to people who either don’t know how bad it is for you, or are extremely overweight and certainly don’t care. I have worked here for over fifty years and have not had a day where I actually enjoyed it. I have always regretted working here because people stereotype me and just assume that I’m extremely stupid, was a high school dropout, and I get awful pay. Only one of those things is true though; I get an awful pay. Ever since I started working here my pay has always become significantly smaller each week. Also, the only food I can afford is from where I work because I get a discount, but it is very unhealthy and made me gain thirty pounds just this summer. Speaking of gaining weight, the manager of the store is unquestionably hefty! He has always made my job miserable. He makes me mop the floors at night, even though that’s not my job, work extra shifts, and clean the toilets which is the worst job of all. I am practically his slave. Ever since I started working here, he has made every single day agonizing, and nothing I can do can change that because he is the manager of the store. Going to work every day feels like I’m in a prison, and if I didn’t need the money so bad, I would have quit a long time ago.